TS loves Softworld, that glamorous accounting software expo ­ at least, the bit that involves boozy lunches and chatting to the pretty marketing girls. Plus, the event always seems to bring up a surprise or two. Last November’s show in Birmingham saw one attendee fall through a false wall ­ a truly spectacular snafu.

But last week Customs achieved the equivalent of smashing into the Softworld hall at Earls Court in an articulated lorry. In front of a packed audience, it announced plans to introduce a new tax-processing software standard, claiming it had spoken to the ICAEW. Cue John Oates, deputy chair of the ICAEW IT faculty, who denied any knowledge of such discussions, and pointed out that the ICAEW has its own accreditations. Frantic meetings followed the handbags, which should see us continue with just the one scheme. Who said the software industry is dull?